I Don't Know WHY...............

I don't know why are you still treating me like this....why are you still all angry at me ? why are you still accusing me with stuff that's not true....why are you treating me cold like this....??

I thought I done my best.....I thought I showed you how much I love you...I care for you....I thought we will be happy again.....I thought you will understand.....I thought you are just discussing with me....

I done all I can....I love you with all my heart....I care for you with all my mind...I miss you with all my energy....I talk to you with all my spirit....but why....

I only sharing with you stuff I know.....why it will get you sad.....I'm not happy that you always bring out my past.....I just want us to be happy together and we can do it if you don't keep on bringing out my past and which is not happening now.....is it worth it that for a small problem which not even a problem to treat me cold and accuse me.......I can let you know that now I'm really sad......u might be thinking I will look for gals and chat with them o wat so comfort me......I'm really tired of you keep on saying this on me because I am not doing it.......................I did once.....but it doesn't mean I will always do it........I'm just trying to make it happy all the time for you....but why you need to always bring my past out and shoot me with it........everyone got their past....its for us to see through it and plan for our better future and not always bringing it out to make us suffer.....what happen already happened.....even if you bring it out you can't change it....the only thing you can change it is the future....why not take the time and energy to plan and build for better future of us.....

I can tell you now....I'm really sad now for you are treating me cold for just a small reason....but I won't be doing what you think I'll do....I will be staying back late in office and just play games....only in games I can don't think about anything or work on so I wont think about anything at all....

I really love you very much....dear please don't bring out my past again to make me sad and suffering like this.....all I want to do is just to make you happy...taking care of you...giving you the best I can....this are the things I wanted to do only being with you...because seeing you happy smiling I too am gonna be happy too.......

Love meaning.....

What's the meaning of loving someone 1 ???

For me...loving you is to always look at you smiling and happy..seeing that you are healthy and well....making sure you are not going through any stress in your life...handling all the stuff for you so that you don't need to worry about anything at all...
Its not just that....Loving you is the source of my energy for everyday waking up and go through my life....right now I'm sick and really weak....because I'm loving you and you are with me...it give me the energy to still able to take good care of you and making you happy...when I'm with you...I'm fully awake and not that sick...but if you are not beside of me...I do be feeling weak and hardly move my legs...sometimes after dropping you off home..I do get tired and falling asleep while driving...
Because of loving you...it also hurts me seeing you getting hurt or crying...I love you very much and I want to see you feeling happy all the time...but if you are crying...tears rounding down to your cheeks from your eyes.....it just hurts me...I do felt useless because I can't stop those tears from rounding down.... I love you very much and my motivation is to make you happy..seeing you always smiling in front of me...It just hurt me too much seeing you all sad sobbing...
I wish I can just take away all those sad memories and sad tears of yours and put in happy tears and keep on putting in all sweet memories into your mind and your heart....

Dear...I'm still doing all my best to full up your life with all sweet memories and experiences so you will never cried for sadness but only crying for over happiness...

I LOVE YOU DEAR LYN....

Still Madly in Love with you...

I'm now sick in the office might faint any moment...but all I can think of is just you my dearest Lynette....The moment I woke up this moment first thing came into my mind is I want you by my side...I want to hold you tight in my arms....I'm sick and I really need you to take care of me...

From morning til now I have been busy with office and add on I'm sick having flu and migrant...But in my mind I'm still missing you very much...keep on asking you what are you doing ? you eat already ? how are you feeling and stuff...

Although I might be very sick but it never occurred in my mind once that I want to take a rest as all I can think of is just keep on taking care of you making you happy always... Dear its like what I told you already...even when I'm very sick..I will still take care of you no matter what...like last night...I'm practically out of strength but I still got up and massage you...I know the moment if I sleep its hard for me to get back up because I'm sick...you told me to lie down only but I refused because I wanted to take care of you first rather than letting you take of me first...this is also because you come first in everything of my life...I put you in my priority list so anything anything happens...the first person come to my mind and I'm worried about will be you first dear...

That's why even when I'm sick I still want to take care of you....this afternoon lunch break I went over to 99 and had lunch alone....I was sick and dreading my legs walking to 99 from my office...First time in my work life I had lunch alone during my lunch break....Usually I had it with you...but because today you are out with friends and enjoying on your day off...I don't want to spoil your day out with friends so I just went to have lunch myself... I'm coughing and having flu but I miss you very dearly and very very much....

But I don't want to get you infected with my flu and cough all dear...I don't want you to be sick because it will be suffering for you and I don't want to see you all weak and suffer from sickness...So dear I might not look for you that much while I'm now sick...I'm sorry...please understand what I'm doing...=( I'm very lonely my dear lynette.....I want to see you so much....I really love you very very very much....with all my heart and feeling I got...

Missing you Very Badly

I don't know how can I put it my feeling for you now...I'm not happy because there seem to be still something in your mind making you doubting me...and its making you being sad... I'm moodless..I'm sad... I'm worried...I'm scared...I'm feeling all this because I scare you will leave me...words that you said to me really hurts me...and the way you texted with me or chatted with me really cold and I don't like...I miss the warm and caring way how you texted me chatted with me...I miss your hugs...I miss your smiles...

I said I will manage to stop your tears from dropping down anymore and you will always be very happy being with me...Last few days we had very very very sweet and nice moments together... I really cherished all those moments when I was holding you tight in my arms..kissing your cheeks..your lips...

But right now...you are thinking about my past and getting sad because of my past...and because my stupid past...it took your away your smiles....

Seeing you sad it also got me sad and moody....being together with you and loving you is my only reason and purpose to go on with my daily boring life....but if that reason is taken away and you don't love me anymore....I do rather die than being a soulless person who only wonder through his life without any aims or targets or purpose of all the stuff he is doing...

Why I said it like this....? because you are my 1st gf...my 1st relationship...my 1st commitment which I really really really put in all my effort and make it perfect for us and you...You are the only one I cherish the most also in my entire life now...the only one I wished and dreamt to build up a family with....and I found out in my life that what I do best is taking good care of you...making you feel secure and safe..Loving you as much as I can til I don't even got love for myself... and this is what I found out I'm best at...I'm doing all this for you all the time...

If you still don't realise it dear.....and still being cold to me....only way I think of to get your caring and your misses is by getting my own health all messed up...getting myself so ill that I can't even wake up and walk....only then I think you will only realise my life is all about you only and you do not need to worry about anything at all..because I'm all faithful to you since the moment we started together...

I really love you dear...and I love you so much I'll do anything to get you care about me......

My Happy Happy Life =)

This morning once I reached my office...I sat there looking at my laptop and thinking about my life....I finds that my life is kinda very perfect and happy now...I tried to think whether I got anything left out in my life or lack of....But the only thing I can think of, its that i'm very happy and there is nothing i need anymore in my life...

Right now my dearest and me are going through a very happy life together...we both felt that we can't lose each other....I know upon saying this a lot of you guys gonna get vomit hahaha but I don't care....this is how I really felt and I'm really happy for it...Finally we both can have a happy life together and cherish each other...

After the patch back...I told myself I must take very good cry of her...not hurting her anymore...and I don't want to make her cry anymore, if she cries it will also be happy reason...I told myself also that no matter what I'll hold onto her forever...carry her on my shoulders forever...help lift up her stress forever....and I'll love her FOREVER !!

Life has never been so perfect for me before....but now everything in my life are just perfect =) this is all because of my angel and that we are very happy together.....I'm happy and satisfied with my life now as long as she is with me and happy....I LOVE YOU MY DEAR !!

Tiring Days But Feeling so so so Happy....

I know everyone might be thinking once I got her back I'm too lazy to post anything on my blog...but its not true guys...I said it before...This blog will be made into a love story book and the love stories will continue on... Ever since I started working its hard for me to look for time to update my blog...but I still try to update it while I'm working...Becoz I said I will be only posting our sweet moments together...I just got back from a roadshow at Bintulu...and I was really tired but I still thinking to post new updates...

Although I'm working but I still continue on to take good care of my dearest and I really felt happier and and sweet taking care of her after my work... When I'm angry or moody...I will always want to massage my dear's legs or smelling her hair...I do get all calm and nice...as long as my angel dear is beside me and with me...I believe and I really can go through everything nicely..

A lot people thought we might not patch back and stuff....but they all are wrong especially those annoymous...and they don't realise that they themselves are actually doing the same thing as what I did...and if they put themselves in my shoes...I believe 100% they will also do the same thing....

Anyway this is the past already and I don't want to talk about it.... I'm feeling that my life has never been happier than before...although every night I will be so tired and fell asleep but I felt its worth it and I love it because after work I will straight away go look for my dear and stay with her....we will go for dinner together then after that I do be staying there til the shop close...and when she is done with her work...I will always bring her back and massage her whole body letting she feel relax not tired... It really had became a hobby for me as in taking care of her like this... If I can't take care of her this way or I can't see her....my life will really be so dull and boring...Just like the time when I was at Bintulu.. Every single day I do miss her badly...

at work whole day I think of nothing but her....the phone is alway on my hands or in front of my face....waiting there for her replies...texting her how much I miss her.. and how much I love her... and I really felt it that I can't leave her at all....she might be able to still go through her days nicely....but for me...its suffering and not nice at all even a day without her by my side...I'm addicted to her...I'm sticky to her....I'm in way way too much love with her....But I Love Being with HER ! I want to do so much for her...I want to earn lots lots lots money for her to spend on....buying stuff that she likes....bringing her to travel...places that she wanted to go so badly...Doing romantic stuff for her...no matter what she likes....I will also go and do it for her...Because she meant everything to me and without her...it means losing everything for me....

I LOVE YOU DEAR LYNETTE !!

Being Busy BUT HAPPY AT ALL TIMES !!

Its been a busy week for me but also a happy week where I spent practically all my time with my dear ! and what's the best thing its that if I cant spend my time with her...I feel kinda sad and I cant concentrate with my work at all....

Every morning when I'm driving to the office I do thinking about and concern about her whether she wake up already or not ? enough sleep or not ? tired or not ? taken her breakfast oalready or not ? Then when I reached my office the 1st thing I do in the office is I open up my laptop and I do stare at the wallpaper for like half a minute ? or more ? Looking at the picture of me and her together on our new start....I will occationally smile while looking at the picture....luckily my colleagues didn't notice anything at all...

Its a new start for us both but things are going very well than I thought of....we are even happier than before we cherish both of us even more....we understand each other now more....and I really love you dear...I'm very happy and glad that we are now really officially patch back together...there are so much things I want to do with you...I want to go travel with you too....

Well 1 thing I managed to prove is the love I got for you and I'm gonna get people around envy about you having such a sweet bf like me...and dear I'm really serious about going forever with you and you don't need to be worrying about anything at all...I will help you out with all you assignments next sem and the coming sem and so on....there were people who did'nt think that we manage to patch back BUT we now managed to shut them up and we proved to them that we really love each other very much....!!! well I'm doing this not just to only prove to other people but to also show it to you dear that I'm serious and I'm really madly in love with you very much dear...and I really will sacrifice anything for you and you already know what I sacrificed for the sake to be with you and love you....I'm really happy being with you dear...I still love you very much and want to go through everything with you...its now this way...I want to go through your life with you dear...whether its sadness or happiness stuff and all I want is to cheer you up and take very very very good care of you just like a precious baby to me =)

I LOVE YOU VERY MUCH DEAR !! *muackz* *HugZ* My life has never been so great before and after patching back....I felt even better already....